Feature Communication Articles
- Articles Index
- Become A Brilliant Conversationalist: Using Probing Questions Guide
- Credibility: Knowing The Difference Between "Understanding From The Outside" and Understanding From The Inside
- Finding The Sweetspot Between Overly Positive and Overly Negative
- Communicating With Or Managing The Overly Positive Or Negative Employee
- Are YOU A Social Media Bore? Probably!
- Why Is There So Little Questioning Used In Social Media Conversations?
- When The People Who NEED The Feedback Are The Least Likely To "Hear" It
- Why I Don't Thank People For Leaving Comments On My Social Media Content
- Gallery: Graphic Meditations On Verbal Abuse and Verbal Violence
- When And How Praise Can Be Toxic
- It's Not What You Say. It's What You Do NOT Say That Makes a Huge Difference with Conflict and Communication
- Focus On Communication In The 2016 Presidential Campaign
- Improving Communication Via The "Less Is More" Principle
- NEW Instructional Video: Delivering Bad News And Minimizing Backlash
Communication Topics
- COMMUNICATION HOME
- The Power of Language Tutorials
- Communication General Questions
- Assertive Communication & Listening
- Communication Styles
- Practical Communication Techniques, Tips, and Advice
- Communication That Creates Conflict - Eliminating Firestarters
- Communicating With Groups and Public Speaking
- Non-Verbal and Paraverbal Communication
- Social Media & Technology
- Communication, learning from goofs, gaffs, and oopsies!
Relatiionship Killer Crossword Puzzle
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Bacal nails it! While more are messing with the entanglements of Customer Satisfaction which leads to no where...he addresses the specifics head on and focuses on the greater picture and ultimate goal of the Customer Experience which leads to Loyalty. Excellent job! (Macy in Oklahoma, 2013)
One of the best things I learned from this book is how to turn a negative experience into a positive one. Using the tools from this gem of a book I have calmed people down, turned bad situations into good, and kept customers who would have otherwise left us and written ten nasty reviews in their wake. It is so empowering to be able to do that, rather than feel awful and abused. This is a must buy, must read for people who work with customers day in and day out. Do it for your own sanity, and to help improve your own job performance and satisfaction! (E. Meehan, California, 2012)
Anyone who serves the public should have this book. It gives advice for everyone from the order taker at the fast food restaurant to higher level management. It also gives different techniques for different situations (ie retail store, office, call center etc.) I have only had this book for a few weeks and already I have improved my customer service skills. It's a wonderful tool. (Lisa S. NJ)
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This is a book excerpt from Imperfect Phrases For Relationships: 101 ImPerfect Phrases You Should Never Say To Someone Important To You...And What To Say Instead.
Example
Can I give you some constructive criticism?
Explanation:
If you research rules for giving feedback, you’ll often be told that this question is ideal for asking permission to provide feedback, because, supposedly, it puts control of the feedback into the hands of the recipient. There is some truth to this, but the advice assumes that both you and the other person understand the “rules of feedback”. That’s often not the case.
This phrase is deadly deceptive, as is the advice surrounding it, because it doesn’t take into account the connotative meaning of this phrase, or in simpler terms, the emotional reactions of people who have experience with this type of question. For many, “constructive criticism” is not so constructive, and it IS their perceptions that determine if this will work or not.
When you use the phrase “constructive feedback” the person you are talking to knows that what is to follow is basically a ‘kick upside the head”, and that you are NOT going to be providing praise or a compliment. Or that if you DO praise, it will be coupled with criticism.
They also know that no matter what they say — yes or no — you’re probably going to tell them anyway.
The problem part is “constructive criticism”, which while technically possible, is interpreted as an oxymoron, two words that contradict each other.
Besides, most people’s experience is that the criticism is not going to be constructive at all.
Make It Better:
- First, ban “constructive criticism” from your vocabulary. Nobody buys it. The word “feedback” is better. Not perfect, but better.
- If you have something to say — some form of feedback or suggestion for behavior change, there’s better language to use:
Can I make a suggestion?
Would you like to hear how I would handle that situation?
I have some ideas about how we could communicate more effectively if you’d like to hear them.
I have some feedback on [topic] I’d be glad to share that might help you achieve your goals more effectively. Would you like to hear it?