Examples:

· How many times have I told you to clean up your room?

· How many times have I told you I’ll be home by my curfew.

· How many times have I told you that we can’t afford...

Explanation:

If there’s royalty among imperfect phrases, this one would be the king or queen because it’s used by so many people.  It doesn’t work, but people say it anyway, when they get tired of repeating themselves, and/or the other person isn’t listening or “obeying”.

Of course, if your goal is to say to the other person, “Are you deaf, stupid or just don’t care about this”, this IS the phrase for you. If you don’t want to say that, then don’t use this phrase. If you want to elicit cooperation, don’t use this phrase.  It’s a way of expressing your anger and frustration, yes, but indirectly, which makes it destructive.

Make It Better:

· John, I’m sure you get tired of me asking you to clean up your room, so let’s make a deal for today. You spend twenty minutes right now on your room, and I won’t mention it again today. Deal?

· John, I know you really want , but we can’t afford it right now, and I don’t think we’ll be able to afford it this year.

· Jackie, asking me the same question is going to get the same answer, and it’s making me angry.