Imperfect Phrases For Relationships

101 COMMON Things You Should Never Say TO Someone Important To You...And What To Say Instead

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Robert's books have sold over 300 thousand copies worldwide, and have been translated into Chinese, French, German and Japanese.

He holds a Masters Degree in Applied Psychology, and has taught clinical and counselling psychology at the college level.

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· Listen to yourself. Are you even paying attention to what you are saying?

· Listen to yourself. You’re being embarrassing.

· Listen to yourself. You can’t possibly mean what you are saying.


This phrase is almost always a put-down, where the “listen to yourself” part is followed by some negative comment. Even the phrase used on its own conveys disapproval, or that the other person isn’t paying attention, or isn’t aware of how he or she is sounding.

If you are trying to help someone who needs to know how he or she is coming across, you need to phrase things to remove the sense of judgment and disapproval.

If you use this phrase to try to win an argument, don’t.

 Make It Better:

· John, here’s how you are sounding to me right now…

· Maybe I can help you think more about this by being a sounding board for you.  

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