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Examples Of This Form of Passive Aggressive Relationship Killers:
· Why would I be upset, just because you ignore me at parties?
· Why would I be upset? I’m used to your being late and not calling.
Sarcasm? Get rid of it. Passive-aggressive? Indeed. You aren’t going to get what you want from any relationship if you use these methods to deal with things that bother you. Both of these examples present you as a victim, the poor, poor, pitiful me syndrome, while confusing the other person with mixed messages.
Remember that while it may be scary to talk about why you are upset in a straightforward, direct and constructive way, hinting at things, or using sarcasm is not going to get things fixed. If it’s important to you that you NOT feel upset, than take ownership of your own feelings and work honestly with the other person. No sniping. No sarcasm.
Make It Better:
· Yes, I am upset because I feel like you don’t pay much attention to me when we go to parties.
· Yes, it bothers me when you are late and don’t call because I start worrying something awful has happened.