Examples:

· Well, that’s just your opinion.

· Well, that’s your opinion, and everybody has one.

· That’s your opinion, but it’s not a fact, is it?

 Explanation:

A statement of the obvious, while sounding like a put-down. In the first example, the use of the term “just” suggests the person’s opinion is almost worthless, so this simple phrase is demeaning, whether you intend it to be so or not.

When you state something that is so obvious, people don’t understand why you are saying something that doesn’t need to be said. They look for ulterior motives, and often they look for unpleasant ulterior motives.

This “obviousness” applies to all three of our examples.

Finally, there’s no help going on here. The phrases don’t offer help, and it’s likely the person to whom you speak these phrases is going to think you are trying to start an argument. That’s probably what you will end up with.

 Make It Better:

Do you want to help, or argue, or prove that you know best? If you want to help here are better approaches that invite the person to discuss things constructively:

· My opinion is different from yours, I think. I’d love to share it with you, if you’d like.

· Since I see the situation differently, I’d be interested in hearing what caused you to form that opinion.