Imperfect Phrases For Relationships

101 COMMON Things You Should Never Say TO Someone Important To You...And What To Say Instead

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Robert's books have sold over 300 thousand copies worldwide, and have been translated into Chinese, French, German and Japanese.

He holds a Masters Degree in Applied Psychology, and has taught clinical and counselling psychology at the college level.

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 Examples of Poor Communication With This Phrase:

· Snap out of it.

· Come on, snap out of it and get with it.

· Snap out of it and pay attention.


This is almost identical to “Pull yourself together”.  It’s like a verbal slap across the face, something you find in old movies, where the hero snaps the other person back to “reality” with a good slap. OK. It’s not a physical slap, but it’s the verbal equivalent.

As with “pull yourself together” the only place this has in constructive conversation is if there’s an urgent situation — for example, in an emergency, if a person seems frozen and you need to get them to act IMMEDIATELY.

It’s a command, so it tends to provoke argument, and it’s not helpful in day to day conversation.

 Make It Better:

· Mary, you seem distracted. Is there something on your mind?

· Jack, I know you’re upset. Take a few deep breaths.

In an emergency:

· Gail, snap out of it. There’s a fire. Get moving out the door. 

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